Episode 74: How to Feel and Release Emotions

In this transformative episode of "Wellness in Every Season," we dive deep into the vital topic of feeling and releasing emotions. Join us as we explore how to recognize and acknowledge your emotions, understanding them as essential messengers offering profound insights into your inner world. Through practical strategies such as journaling, mindful breathing, and physical movements, you will learn effective ways to manage and release your emotions. We'll also discuss how to share these practices with your family, creating a supportive environment where everyone can express and process their feelings healthily. Tune in to gain valuable tools that will help you navigate your emotional landscape, leading to greater inner peace and emotional well-being for you and your loved ones.

One last thing to cover the show legally. I am a certified life coach giving general advice. So think of this more like a self-help book. This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. I am not a licensed therapist. So this podcast shouldn't be taken as a replacement for professional guidance from my doctor therapist. Or any other qualified expert? If you want personal one-on-one coaching for my certified coach. Go to my website, wellness and every season.com. 

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Transcript

Title: Episode 74: How to Feel and Release Emotions

Intro: 

This is Episode 74

Welcome to Wellness in Every Season, the podcast where we explore the rich tapestry of motherhood and wellness in all its forms. I'm your host, Autumn Carter, a certified life coach and parenting coach dedicated to empowering mothers to rediscover their identity beyond motherhood.

Find balance amidst chaos. Strengthen relationships and pursue their dreams. My goal is to help mothers thrive both as individuals and as parents.

[Music]

EPISODE INTRO

Welcome to Episode 74 of "Wellness in Every Season." Today’s episode, titled "How to Feel and Release Emotions," dives deep into a topic that has profoundly shaped my life and might be affecting yours more than you realize. Emotions are a fundamental part of our human experience, yet many of us struggle with how to feel, understand, and release them effectively. In this episode, I’ll share my personal journey, practical life hacks for managing emotions, and ways to involve your family in this transformative process. Join me as we explore the importance of acknowledging our emotions, understanding their origins, and finding healthy ways to let them flow through us, leading to greater inner peace and emotional well-being.

Key point #1: 

For much of my childhood, expressing feelings beyond anger was off-limits. This repression led to a cascade of issues, both physical and emotional. I developed stomach problems that still bother me when I am not checking in with myself, battled acne well past my teenage years, and struggle to accept all parts of myself. This refusal to listen to my body culminated in a serious health crisis when my gallbladder finally gave out on me six weeks after my third child was born.

Reflecting on these experiences, I’ve realized how crucial it is to listen to our bodies and not bottle up our emotions. We live in a time where we’re constantly on the go, often too busy to acknowledge what we’re truly feeling. This episode is dedicated to helping you find relief from this cycle of repression and discomfort.My journey towards emotional freedom began with a profound realization: I am not my emotions. For much of my life, I had allowed my emotions to define and control me, often feeling overwhelmed and consumed by them. This epiphany was a turning point that set me free from the fear of feeling. Instead of being dominated by my emotions, I began to approach them with a sense of curiosity and openness.

Growing up, expressing any feelings outside of anger was not acceptable. This repression led to significant physical and emotional distress. As I said, I dealt with chronic stomach issues and persistent acne well into adulthood, as well as painful, long and heavy periods. Clear signals from my body that something was wrong. However, I ignored these signs, believing that pushing through without addressing my feelings was the best way to cope and overcome. This pattern of neglect continued until a serious health scare—my gallbladder failed, forcing me to confront the undeniable truth that my body was in distress.

Despite this painful reminder, it wasn't until much later that I truly began to address the root causes of my emotional and physical pain. For one thing, I had a six week old baby, a 20-month-old and a five-year-old to take care of. Less than a year ago, through working with a somatics coach and delving deeper into my past in trauma therapy, I started to explore my emotions without judgment. During this exploration, I began to realize that the anger I held on to was not mine but my father’s.In fact, some of the anger was generational, my grandfather was an angry person and from what I heard growing up so was his father. Understanding this was liberating; it allowed me to let go of the anger and start discovering who I truly was.

Revisiting painful memories and acknowledging truths I had long avoided was an incredibly healing process. I realized that emotions are not enemies but messengers, offering insights into my inner world. Now, when I feel anger, sadness, or fear, I allow myself to explore these feelings. I ask myself questions like, "Why am I feeling this way?" or "What triggered this emotion?" By observing my emotions with curiosity, I can uncover the underlying issues that need to be addressed.

This self-exploration not only provides insight into why I feel a certain way but also gives me the power to release these emotions in a healthy manner. Embracing all parts of myself, even the messy and complicated ones, has been transformative, allowing me to connect more deeply with myself and others.

This journey towards understanding and releasing emotions is what I want to share with you today. Creating a safe space for yourself to explore your feelings without distraction is the first step. This mindfulness practice will guide you through the process of feeling, observing, and releasing emotions, helping you find balance and peace. Let’s dive in and begin this journey together.

Key point #2: 

Growing up in an abusive home, I learned how to survive at a very early age, developing a heightened fight, flight, or freeze response. This mechanism, essential in my formative years, later became a significant challenge in my search for inner peace and emotional freedom.

As a child in such a turbulent environment, I was constantly on alert, always ready for the next unpredictable challenge. This state of vigilance continued into my adulthood,especially as a mom, manifesting as an enduring sense of unease, even in safe environments. Recognizing the need for change, I turned to therapy, self-help, and life coaching, which became my avenues for healing and transformation.

In therapy, I confronted and started healing from my past traumas. It was a journey of uncovering and understanding the patterns that had shaped my early experiences. Self-help books offered me practical tools and insights, helping me reshape my thoughts and responses. Honestly, I have been a self-help junkie almost my whole life. I love exploring different perspectives. However, it was earning my life coaching certification that introduced me to the concept of feeling and releasing emotions.

My journey towards emotional freedom began with the profound realization that I am not my emotions. For much of my life, I had allowed my emotions to define and control me, often feeling overwhelmed and consumed by them. It felt like a fight within myself because at my core I am not an angry person, I long for peace and to share it with others, but I felt so much raging anger. This epiphany was a turning point that set me free from the fear of feeling. Instead of being dominated by my emotions, I began to approach them with a sense of curiosity and openness.

During this exploration, I began to realize that the anger I held on to was not mine but my father’s. Understanding this was liberating; it allowed me to let go of the anger and start discovering who I truly was. Revisiting painful memories in therapy and acknowledging truths I had long avoided was an incredibly healing process. I realized during my somatics sessions that emotions are not enemies but messengers, offering insights into my inner world.

Now, when I feel anger, sadness, or fear, I allow myself to explore these feelings. I ask myself questions like, "Why am I feeling this way?" or "What triggered this emotion?" By observing my emotions with curiosity, I can uncover the underlying issues that need to be addressed. This self-exploration not only provides insight into why I feel a certain way but also gives me the power to release these emotions in a healthy manner. Embracing all parts of myself, even the messy and complicated ones, has been transformative, allowing me to connect more deeply with myself and others.

This journey involved engaging in practices like meditation, journaling, and mindfulness exercises. These helped me slow down my thoughts, become more aware of my internal dialogue, and differentiate between the reactive patterns of my past and the intuitive guidance from my true self.

By connecting with my true self, I found a wellspring of inner peace, strength, and wisdom. I learned to trust my intuition, make decisions aligned with my true values, and see challenges as opportunities for growth. This profound inner transformation was reflected in my external world, positively influencing my relationships, parenting style, and my community contributions.

My story is a testament to the power of the human spirit to overcome adversity and find a path toward healing and fulfillment. It shows that no matter one's past, there is always the potential to access a place of inner wisdom and abundance, guiding one towards a life filled with peace, understanding, and profound fulfillment.

Now that you have a foundation by learning parts of my story, let’s explore what you need by starting with a mindfulness practice.

[Music]

Segment: Mindfulness Practice: 

Welcome to today’s mindfulness practice, where we'll explore the journey of feeling and releasing emotions. Let’s begin by finding a quiet and comfortable space where you won’t be disturbed. Sit or lie down in a relaxed position, close your eyes, and take a few deep breaths. Allow yourself to settle into the present moment.

The first step is to create a safe space for yourself, where you can be alone with your thoughts and feelings without distraction. This environment will serve as a sanctuary for you to explore your emotions freely and without judgment.

Now, gently bring your attention to your inner world. Reflect on your day today or yesterday. Notice any emotions that arise without judgment. Allow yourself to feel whatever comes up, whether it's joy, sadness, anger, or fear. Don’t try to push these feelings away or change them. Emotions are not your enemies; they are messengers, offering insight into your inner experiences. Simply acknowledge them and give them space to be.

Next, observe these emotions with a sense of curiosity. Imagine you are a compassionate detective, seeking to understand your inner landscape. Ask yourself questions like, "Why am I feeling this way?" or "What triggered this emotion?" Allow your mind to explore these questions gently. You might find that your emotions are linked to specific events, memories, or thoughts. Sometimes, this might involve revisiting painful memories or acknowledging truths you’ve been avoiding, but remember that this exploration is a crucial part of the healing process.

As you delve deeper, try to identify any specific triggers for your emotions. It might be helpful to mentally note or even jot down your observations. Understanding what has caused your emotions can provide clarity and direction for your next steps.

Once you’ve identified the triggers, it’s time to find healthy ways to release these emotions. Consider which methods resonate most with you:

Engage in physical activities like exercise, yoga, or a mindful walk. Movement can help to release stored energy and emotions from your body.

Explore creative outlets like writing, drawing, painting, or playing music. These activities allow you to express and process your emotions creatively.

Talk to someone you trust about what you’re feeling. Sharing your emotions with a supportive listener can be incredibly healing.

Visualize your emotions as waves flowing through you. Allow them to move freely and then gently let them go. Picture them dissolving or flowing out of your body, leaving you feeling lighter and more at peace.

Throughout this practice, remember to be kind and compassionate with yourself. It’s okay to feel vulnerable and to take your time with this process. Embrace all parts of yourself, even the messy and complicated ones. Acknowledge your courage in facing your emotions and take comfort in knowing that each step brings you closer to healing and balance.

Take a few more deep breaths, bringing your awareness back to the present moment. When you’re ready, slowly open your eyes. Carry this sense of mindfulness and self-compassion with you throughout your day, knowing that you have the power to observe, understand, and release your emotions in a healthy and empowering way.

[Music]

Key point #3: 

Thank you for joining me in today’s mindfulness practice. Now, let’s take a moment to reflect on what happens when we ignore our emotions and how it can affect us deeply.

Often, when we neglect our emotions, they can build up and overwhelm us like a powerful wave. Imagine a wave crashing over you when you least expect it, taking you by surprise and leaving you feeling disoriented and overwhelmed. This is what happens when we push our emotions aside instead of acknowledging and addressing them. These waves can bring with them intense feelings of sadness, anger, or anxiety, catching us off guard and throwing us into a cycle of guilt.

We might feel guilty for experiencing these emotions in the first place, guilty for not dealing with them sooner, or guilty for how we react to them once they surface. This guilt can create a vicious cycle. We feel bad about our emotions, so we ignore them, hoping they’ll go away. But instead, they build up, becoming stronger and more difficult to manage. When they finally break through, we feel even worse, reinforcing our habit of ignoring them and perpetuating the cycle.

Breaking this cycle requires acknowledging our emotions as they arise and giving them the attention they deserve. By doing so, we prevent them from building up and overwhelming us. This process involves being mindful of our feelings, understanding their origins, and finding healthy ways to release them.

Remember that emotions are natural and part of the human experience. They are not our enemies but messengers trying to tell us something important about our inner world. By approaching them with curiosity and compassion, we can learn to understand and manage them better.

As you move forward, carry this sense of mindfulness and self-compassion with you. When emotions arise, allow yourself to feel them, explore their origins, and release them in a healthy way. Trust that by doing this, you are taking important steps toward emotional freedom and inner peace.

[Music]

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[Music]

Key point #4: 

Welcome back. Thank you for staying with us. Now, let’s take a moment to reflect on what happens when we ignore our emotions and how it can affect us deeply.

Often, when we neglect our emotions, they can build up and overwhelm us like a powerful wave. Imagine a wave crashing over you when you least expect it, taking you by surprise and leaving you feeling disoriented and overwhelmed. This is what happens when we push our emotions aside instead of acknowledging and addressing them. These waves can bring with them intense feelings of sadness, anger, or anxiety, catching us off guard and throwing us into a cycle of guilt.

We might feel guilty for experiencing these emotions in the first place, guilty for not dealing with them sooner, or guilty for how we react to them once they surface. This guilt can create a vicious cycle. We feel bad about our emotions, so we ignore them, hoping they’ll go away. But instead, they build up, becoming stronger and more difficult to manage. When they finally break through, we feel even worse, reinforcing our habit of ignoring them and perpetuating the cycle.

Breaking this cycle requires acknowledging our emotions as they arise and giving them the attention they deserve. By doing so, we prevent them from building up and overwhelming us. This process involves being mindful of our feelings, understanding their origins, and finding healthy ways to release them.

Remember that emotions are natural and part of the human experience. They are not our enemies but messengers trying to tell us something important about our inner world. By approaching them with curiosity and compassion, we can learn to understand and manage them better.

Reflecting on my own journey, my path to emotional freedom began with the profound realization that I am not my emotions. For much of my life, I had allowed my emotions to define and control me, often feeling overwhelmed and consumed by them. This epiphany was a turning point that set me free from the fear of feeling. Instead of being dominated by my emotions, I began to approach them with a sense of curiosity and openness.

During this exploration, I began to realize that the anger I held on to was not mine but my father’s. Understanding this was liberating; it allowed me to let go of the anger and start discovering who I truly was. Revisiting painful memories and acknowledging truths I had long avoided was an incredibly healing process. I realized that emotions are not enemies but messengers, offering insights into my inner world.

Now, let’s talk about worthiness and self-love, and how they are integral to this process of emotional healing. Worthiness is the belief that you deserve good things in life simply because you exist. It’s about recognizing that your value isn’t contingent on your accomplishments or the approval of others but is inherent within you.

When we struggle with feelings of unworthiness, it can be difficult to face our emotions. We might feel that we don’t deserve to take the time to care for ourselves or that our feelings aren’t important. But the truth is, every emotion you feel is valid, and you are deserving of the time and space to process and heal.

Learning to love yourself is a vital part of this journey. Self-love means accepting yourself fully, including your emotions, imperfections, and past experiences. It’s about treating yourself with the same kindness and compassion that you would offer to a dear friend.

When we feel emotions like anger, sadness, or fear, allowing ourselves to explore these feelings can help us understand their origins and triggers. This self-exploration not only provides insight into why we feel a certain way but also gives us the power to release these emotions healthily. Embracing all parts of ourselves, even the messy and complicated ones, is transformative. It allows us to connect more deeply with ourselves and others, fostering a sense of inner peace and strength.

As you move forward, carry this sense of worthiness and self-love with you. When emotions arise, allow yourself to feel them, explore their origins, and release them in a healthy way. Trust that by doing this, you are honoring your worth and taking important steps toward emotional freedom and inner peace.

Thank you for taking this time for yourself today. Embrace this journey with kindness and compassion, knowing that each step brings you closer to a balanced and fulfilling life, grounded in the recognition of your own worth and the love you deserve.

[Music]

Lifehack segment:

Now, let’s turn this understanding into a practical life hack you can use every day to manage your emotions effectively.

Life Hack: Managing Emotions for Inner Peace

Become Aware of Your Emotions: The first step is awareness. Notice when emotions arise, whether they are subtle or intense. Acknowledge them without judgment.

Honor and Accept Your Emotions: Allow yourself to feel whatever emotions come up. Accept them as a natural part of your human experience. Remember, emotions are messengers, not enemies.

Journal About Your Emotions: If you find yourself stuck or overwhelmed, take a moment to journal about what you’re feeling. Writing can help you process and understand your emotions better.

Connect Physically with Your Emotions: Place your hand on the area of your body where you feel the emotion most intensely. This might be your chest, stomach, or any other place. Alternatively, breathe into that area, focusing on sending calm and soothing energy there.

Allow the Emotion to Flow Through You: Imagine the emotion as a wave or a river flowing through you. Allow it to move without trying to hold on to it or push it away. If you start to feel overwhelmed, focus on your breath to help it flow out of you.

Breathe and Relax: If the emotion becomes too intense, take deep breaths to help you stay grounded. Inhale slowly and exhale gently, allowing your body to relax with each breath. This helps prevent you from being overcome by the emotion and supports its natural release.

Listen to What You Need: Without judgment, listen to what your body and mind need in this moment. What is the emotion trying to tell you? What healing needs to occur? Allow other thoughts and feelings to come up, and give them space to be heard.

Ask Yourself Key Questions: Reflect on the following questions to gain deeper insight:

What is this emotion trying to tell me?

What triggered this emotion?

What healing needs to occur?

What else is coming up for me?

Movement to Release Emotions: Sometimes, emotions can feel stuck and need physical movement to be released. Try these movements:

Shaking: Stand up and shake out your hands, arms, legs, and whole body. This can help release tension and pent-up energy.

Stretching: Engage in gentle stretching, focusing on areas where you feel tightness. Stretching can help release physical and emotional tension.

Dancing: Put on some music and let your body move freely. Dancing is a great way to express and release emotions.

Walking: Go for a mindful walk, paying attention to the sensations in your body and the environment around you.

Sounds to Release Emotions: Making sounds can also help release emotions:

Sighing: Take a deep breath and let out a long, audible sigh. This can release tension and bring a sense of relief.

Humming: Hum a soothing tune or just hum without a melody. The vibrations can be calming and help release emotions.

Vocalizing: If you feel comfortable, try vocalizing sounds like "ahh," "ohh," or even a gentle growl. Letting out sounds can be a powerful way to release stuck emotions.

By following these steps and incorporating movement and sound, you can manage your emotions more effectively, honoring them as valuable parts of your inner experience. This practice helps you stay connected with yourself and promotes emotional healing and balance. Integrating this life hack into your daily routine can lead to a greater sense of inner peace and self-awareness. Remember, emotions are part of the journey, and by managing them mindfully, you can navigate life with more clarity and compassion.

[Music]

Key point #5: 

Now that we've discussed a practical life hack for managing emotions, let's talk about how you can share what you've learned with your family, turning this into a collaborative journey for everyone.

Once you have started to manage your emotions effectively, consider sharing these practices with your family. Here’s how you can make it a family endeavor.

Open a Dialogue. Start by having an open conversation with your family about the importance of managing emotions. Share your own experiences and explain how these practices have helped you. Use language that is appropriate for all ages to ensure everyone understands.

Model the Behavior. Children and other family members often learn by observing. Demonstrate how you handle your emotions in a healthy way and invite them to join you in these practices. When they see you actively managing your emotions, they are more likely to adopt similar behaviors.

Create a Safe Space. Encourage your family members to share their emotions without fear of judgment. Create an environment where everyone feels comfortable expressing themselves. This might involve setting aside time each day to talk about how everyone is feeling.

Family Journaling. Introduce the idea of keeping a family journal where everyone can write about their feelings. This can help each member process their emotions and understand each other better. Younger children can draw their feelings if writing is too challenging.

Practice Together. Engage in physical activities, breathing exercises, and sound releases as a family. Make it a fun and inclusive activity. For example, you can have a dance party to release tension or go for a family walk to encourage mindful movement.

Ask Key Questions as a Family. During family discussions, ask reflective questions that help everyone understand their emotions better. Questions like "What made you feel happy today?" or "Did anything make you feel upset?" can open up valuable conversations.

Use Movement and Sounds Collectively. Incorporate movements and sounds into your family routine. You might all take a few moments to stretch together in the morning, shake out the tension after school or work, or hum a soothing tune before bed. These activities can help release emotions and bond the family.

Celebrate Emotional Wins. Acknowledge and celebrate when family members successfully manage their emotions. Positive reinforcement can encourage everyone to continue practicing these healthy habits.

Listen Without Judgment. Make sure that each family member feels heard. Listen to their needs and concerns without rushing to solve their problems. Sometimes, simply being heard is enough to help someone process their emotions.

By integrating these practices into your family life, you can create a supportive environment where everyone feels empowered to manage their emotions healthily. This not only helps each individual but also strengthens family bonds, fostering a more harmonious home life. Remember, emotions are part of the journey, and by navigating them together, you can support each other in finding balance and peace.

[Music]

Segment: Coaching Questions

Here are ten coaching questions to tie in all the topics we discussed about managing and sharing emotions, self-awareness, and fostering a supportive family environment:

1. What emotions have you noticed arising in yourself recently, and how have you acknowledged them?

2. How can you create a safe space for yourself and your family to explore and express emotions without judgment?

3. Can you recall a recent situation where you felt overwhelmed by an emotion? How did you manage it, and what could you do differently next time?

4. How do you think journaling about your emotions can help you and your family understand and process feelings better?

5. When you place your hand on the area where you feel an emotion most intensely, what do you notice about the connection between your mind and body?

6. What physical activities or movements can you incorporate into your daily routine to help release emotions that feel stuck?

7. How can you use sounds like sighing, humming, or vocalizing to release emotions effectively?

8. In what ways can you model healthy emotional management behaviors for your family to observe and learn from?

9. How can you encourage open and honest conversations about emotions with your family, ensuring everyone feels heard and supported?

10. What steps can you take to celebrate and acknowledge your family members' successes in managing their emotions, reinforcing positive habits and strengthening your family bond?

Throughout this journey, I’ve learned that self-compassion is essential. It’s okay to feel vulnerable, to make mistakes, and to not have all the answers. Embracing all parts of myself, even the parts that are messy and complicated, has been a transformative experience. It’s allowed me to connect more deeply with myself and others, and to live a more authentic and fulfilling life.

I hope that by sharing my story, you will feel inspired to embark on your own journey of emotional exploration and healing. Remember, you are not your emotions. You have the power to observe them, understand them, and ultimately release them. Let’s share this episode and explore all the ways we can begin to feel and release our emotions, leading to a more balanced and healthy community.

CLOSING REMARKS & EPISODE SUMMARY

Episode summary:

In the latest episode of "Wellness in Every Season," titled "How to Feel and Release Emotions," we embarked on a transformative journey together. Throughout the episode, listeners learned how to recognize and acknowledge their emotions, understanding that feelings are essential messengers offering insight into our inner world. You experienced practical strategies for managing and releasing emotions, such as journaling, mindful breathing, and physical movements. We also explored how to share these practices with your family, fostering a supportive environment where everyone can express and process their emotions healthily. As you listened and participated, you gained valuable tools to navigate your emotional landscape, leading to greater inner peace and emotional well-being for you and your loved ones.

[Music]

Outro: 

Thank you for joining me on Wellness in Every Season. Remember to take time to relax, heal, and be present. Next week, we will be talking to Sharon King about birth trauma and how to rewrite it.

Thanks for tuning into this week's episode. I am your host Autumn Carter, a certified life coach and parenting coach Dedicated to empowering mothers to rediscover their identity beyond motherhood, find balance amidst chaos, Strengthen relationships, and pursue their dreams.

My goal is to help moms thrive both as individuals and as parents. I hope today's discussion inspired you and offered valuable insights. Stay engaged with our motherhood wellness community by signing up for my newsletter at wellnessineveryseason. com slash free Dash resources. When you join, you'll have the option to receive a five day guide called Awaken and Unwind, five days to mastering moms, mornings and evening, along with free guides, special offers on my programs, practical tips, personal stories, and much more by signing up for both offers on the page.

Don't miss out on these valuable resources designed to help you thrive in every area of wellness as a mom and as an individual. Join today and start your journey to wellness in every season. Your shares, subscriptions, and reviews help us reach more moms seeking empowerment. So please spread the word about our podcast.

Thank you for being a part of our podcast community. I look forward to continuing our conversation, sharing stories, and exploring wellness in all aspects of motherhood. Take care until our next episode. You can also work with me one on one or on demand through one of my programs by visiting wellnessineveryseason.com/programs.

One last thing to cover the show legally. I am a certified life coach giving general advice. So think of this more like a self-help book. This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. I am not a licensed therapist. So this podcast shouldn't be taken as a replacement for professional guidance from a doctor or therapist. If you want personal one-on-one coaching from a certified life and parenting coach, Go to my website, wellnessineveryseason.com. That's where you can get personalized coaching from me.

See you in next week's episode.